Bitter Pills, Breathing Spaces

Original Post Date: September 17, 2005 (Friendster)

"My heart hurts bad… I’m at it again… Another untouchable!"

So says a friend who’s in love with an untouchable… a person who’s completely in love or attached with another; someone you can’t really have.

My friend often falls into the pit of loving, and even to the point of pursuing, someone who’s completely attached — married or otherwise. And here I am, listening to wails of pure frustration. But I truly get where these feelings were coming from… a person who wants and needs to give and have love!

I was suddenly befuddled by a statement my friend threw at me: "Have you never felt this way? Well, then, I guess you’re lucky."

I wanted so badly to say something, but I ended up just muttering a weak agreement… "Maybe I am lucky."

Am I really lucky? Honestly, I don’t feel like it because I’ve had my own share of untouchables too. However, I always took a different path than my friend.

I just hid in my shell…

long enough until the flame dies a natural death…

long enough until the memory becomes a figment of my imagination…

long enough until I am able to let go and come out of my shell…

For now, I guess, I’ll just stay in my shell.